How to communicate with a neurodivergent team.

One of the questions we get asked most consistently by heads of department, producers and welfare teams is some version of this: I think someone on my team is neurodivergent, they haven't disclosed anything, and I don't know what to do.

It is a genuinely difficult position. And the honest answer is that you don't need to know whether someone is neurodivergent to manage them well. What you need is a working culture where communication preferences are made explicit for everyone, not just for the people you've identified as possibly struggling.

That shift in framing from 'how do I manage my neurodivergent team member' to 'how do I build an environment where everyone can communicate how they work best' is the most practical thing anyone leading a team can do. Here is what that looks like in practice.

Start with a Working With Me conversation

When someone joins your team, most of the conversation is about the job: what they'll be doing, who they report to, what the deadlines are. Rarely does anyone ask: how do you like to work? What communication style gets the best out of you? What should I know about how you process information?

We call this a Working With Me conversation, and it doesn’t need to be formal or lengthy. It can be as simple as saying, before we get into the project, I find it really useful to understand how different people work best, so is there anything that would help you work well with me, or anything I should know about how you prefer to receive information?

That question does several things at once. It opens the door for neurodivergent people who have not disclosed (and are unlikely to unless they feel it is safe) to share something without having to name a diagnosis. It signals that you are not going to assume everyone works the same way. And it starts a conversation that, if you have it at the beginning, takes out the majority of issues further down the line.

The conversation that feels like it costs ten minutes at the start of a project saves hours of miscommunication later.

The emailers versus callers problem

A significant proportion of communication friction in most workplaces comes down to a mismatch in how people process information, and most of it goes unaddressed because neither party realises what is happening.

Some people process information best when it arrives in writing. It gives them time to think, to regulate their response, and to come back to the conversation with clarity rather than an immediate reaction. Others prefer a quick call precisely because email creates anxiety. The message sits there, the tone is ambiguous, and the wait for a reply is worse than the conversation itself.

Neither preference is wrong. Both are common in neurodivergent people and in neurotypical people alike. The problem arises when one person's default becomes the other person's source of stress and nobody has ever named it.

The fix is simple: ask. How do you prefer to receive information? If I need to flag something urgent, what is the best way to reach you? Is there anything about how we communicate that would make your working day easier?

And be honest about your own preferences too. If you hate voice notes, say so. If you need people to put things in one message rather than seventeen consecutive WhatsApps, say that. Communication preferences work both ways, and modelling honesty about your own creates the environment where others will do the same.

Feedback - the thing many leaders get wrong

The film and TV industry has almost no formal feedback culture. There are no annual reviews, no structured check-ins, no HR departments enforcing good practice. Most people receive feedback in two forms: someone says something good happened, or someone says something went wrong. The neutral middle, the ongoing, specific, genuine acknowledgement of work, is largely absent.

For neurodivergent people, and particularly for those with ADHD, this is more than an inconvenience. Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) is an intense, often physical, response to perceived rejection or criticism. It is not a personality trait or an overreaction. It is a neurological response that affects a significant proportion of people with ADHD, and it means that an ambiguous 'yeah, sure' in response to something someone has worked hard on can genuinely spiral into 'I'm terrible at my job and I'm going to be let go.'

The most important thing to understand about RSD is that it responds to perceived rejection, which means a non-response, an ambiguous reply, or a cursory acknowledgement can trigger it just as much as explicit criticism.

The antidote is not excessive praise. Empty praise is worse than nothing, because neurodivergent people with hyper-empathy will often sense that it is not genuine, which makes everything worse. The antidote is specific, honest, timely feedback.

When someone does something well, say what it was and why it mattered. When something needs to change, frame it around the outcome rather than the person. That approach created this difficulty, so next time let's try this instead. And always give the ‘why’. If you explain the reason behind a decision or a piece of feedback, you will get significantly more from a neurodivergent brain than if you issue a directive and expect it to be followed without question.

When someone is visibly struggling

Shutdown and meltdown look different from person to person. Someone going into shutdown may become monosyllabic, withdrawn, slower to respond. Someone heading toward a meltdown may become more emotional, reactive, or appear to overreact to something small. Both are the endpoint of a cumulative process of sensory overload, sustained masking and emotional pressure, and the thing that triggers the visible response is rarely the actual cause.

In the moment, the most useful thing you can do is offer space without pressure. A quiet room, the option to step away, no demand for immediate explanation or apology. Do not try to have the conversation about what happened while it is happening.

Later though, and this part is important, do have the conversation. Not as a debrief or a performance management discussion, but as a genuine attempt to understand what the environment contributed and what might be adjusted. The goal is not to prevent all difficult moments, which is not possible. The goal is to understand the pattern well enough to reduce the frequency and severity.

None of this requires a diagnosis. It requires treating the people on your team as individuals whose brains work differently from each other, and being willing to ask what that means in practice.

NeuroJungle delivers neurodivergence training for film and TV organisations and production teams. To find out more, visit our services page or get in touch at hello@neurojungle.co.uk.